Train

What’s the first thing you think of when you hear the word discipline? As a mom of three, I think of child-tears, frustration, time-outs (or worse), and me feeling frazzled and worn out. Discipline, if we’re honest, is not fun. Rewarding in the long run? Sure. But not exactly a word with a positive connotation.

So when I talk about spiritual disciplines? Well, the danger for you and for me is that we can bring this somewhat negative connotation into the conversation. But Scripture uses several words that are translated at “discipline.” One means to chastise, correct, or instruct (see Hebrews 12:6-7). But here’s some good news: God’s Word uses entirely different words to talk about discipline in terms of our spiritual formation. Consider this excerpt from my book, The Busy Mom’s Guide to Spiritual Survival:

As we look at the spiritual disciplines, we’re instead aiming for the concepts of gumnazo and askeo. Gumnazo—from which we derive the English word gymnasium—means discipline in the sense of athletic exercise and training. We’re talking about a spiritual sweat here: regular “workouts” that keep our faith in shape. This is the word Paul uses when he urges Timothy, “[T]rain yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come” (1 Timothy 4:7-8, emphasis added). This is the same connotation the writer of Hebrews intends when he prods his readers by saying, “Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teachings about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil” (Hebrews 5:13-14, emphasis added).

Askeo means the discipline of a master craftsman who employs skill, persistent determination, and great effort to turn raw material into a piece of art.

12 Days (and 48.25 Songs)

Merry Christmas!

It’s here! It is upon us! Here’s a blog post from last year which I still love, so I’m sharing it again (with updated numbers!):

Christmas wasn’t just yesterday. In the church calendar, Christmas literally is to be celebrated for 12 days! So even today in your post-Christmas-Day-recovery-mode, your heart can continue to sing at the manger and wonder at the glory of the Incarnation.

One simple celebration idea I want to share is to infuse this week with music. Christmas carols and hymns proclaim some of the most stunning theological truths! One of my favorite web sites, the cyberhymnal, has the lyrics (and music to listen to) for 579 Christmas hymns. Yes, 579!!!

So, if you want to sing them all, that’s 48.25 songs per day for the 12 days of Christmas. (If you missed yesterday, you’ll need to catch up!)

But in all seriousness, I do believe one of the most profound ways I’ve encountered God in my personal times of prayer and worship has been in pondering old hymns that are new to me. Find time this week to visit Cyberhymnal (or your own hymnal on your bookshelf) and prayerfully ponder the lyrics of a Christmas hymn that is new to you.

When all is cleaned up, when our culture has moved on from Christmas after just 24-hours, you can remain at the manger.

Live in the wonder.

The Miracle

All the waiting, all the yearning, all the longing . . . all caught up into one spectacular mystery. The fullness of God entering into humanity, taking on the limitations of flesh and bone and breath. With divine compassion, experiencing our frailty. With grace spanning eternity past to infinite future, entering into finite time and limited space.

The miracle of the Incarnation.

When God answered the prayer, “O Come!” When the promises of the ages appeared in a strange and hardly recognizable fulfillment: the King of Kings, the Desire of Nations, in the wrinkled palms and piercing wail of a suckling, swaddled infant.

This is the miracle and the mystery: That in the first Advent, Emmanuel came. And that we await his Second Advent in which all these promises bloom into ultimate fulfillment.

O come, O come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel,
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear.

REJOICE! REJOICE!

Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Israel!

When Christmas Hurts

Last year my friend, author Holley Gerth, stopped by this blog to share some thoughts about the spiritual discipline of celebration and what it means to celebrate even when life is difficult or painful. Advent & Christmas can be very painful times for those who are suffering, who are depressed, who’ve walked through tragedy. If that’s you — if you’re hurting while the rest of the world is celebrating — find encouragement in this interview with Holley as she shares a bit about her own approach toward holidays during difficult times.

[From December 2011]

You may have heard of Holley Gerth – she’s got a hugely popular blog called “Heart to Heart with Holley.” She’s the author of Rain on Me, God’s Heart for You, and You’re Already Amazing. She’s also created thousands of greeting cards and gifts for DaySpring, the Christian subsidiary of Hallmark and is the cofounder of their web site for women, (in)courage. Holley shares her heart and home with Mark and a crazy dog.

I’m sure you’ll be encouraged and inspired by her honest words.  Keep reading . . . 

Holley, tell my readers about yourself!

I love chocolate, coffee, my husband, and Jesus (not in that order). I’m not a morning person—I once put chocolate on the alarm clock to bribe myself to get up. I ate it and went back to bed. Yes, ma’am. But I married an early bird so I’m learning to change my ways. I’m named after my Grandpa Hollie. He and my Grandma had a  Christian bookstore so I grew up dreaming of being a writer. Being able to share God’s heart with women through words is my passion and I feel so grateful to be able to do so every day. It’s the next best thing to having coffee with all of my readers—which I would do if I could!

This month we’re looking at the twin spiritual disciplines of worship and celebration. In a very basic sense, I define them as praising and thanking God for who he is (worship); and praising and thanking God for what he does (celebration). Why do you think these disciplines are important?

Our church service last night was actually about worship and how it transforms us. The pastor talked about how closely the word “worship” is related to “service” in Greek and Hebrew.Over time I’ve come to see worship not as what we do at church but as a lifestyle of serving Jesus. To me, worship means bowing our hearts to God and saying, “I’m your servant. Use me as little or as much as you want.” That’s actually the prayer I say each morning as I get ready to write. I’ve also started writing what I’m thankful for in a journal each day. I use an unlined journal and draw all kinds of crazy pictures and things. But it works for me.

I recently read that our brains have a natural “negativity bias.” In other words, we tend to focus on and remember what’s negative better. That is a gift from God to help us survive (for example, focusing more on the bear charging out of the woods than the lovely flower behind it). But on a day-to-day basis, it means that we have to be intentional about refocusing our hearts and attention. We don’t need to feel guilty about our tendency to be negative but we do need to recognize it and change it through worship and gratitude. What’s amazing is that our brains literally rewire themselves as we think new thoughts. We actually create new neural pathways and are “transformed by the renewing of our minds.” Isn’t that beautiful?

Wow — Yes! Celebration can take many forms — gratitude, joy, prayer, praise, feasting, and more. When has celebration made a difference in your life?

I feel like this has been a year of learning to embrace joy in my life.

10 Advent Observance Ideas

Looking for ways to observe Advent with your kids? Or hoping to do something new this December for your own spiritual growth? My good friend Joy-Elizabeth Lawrence and I put together 9 of our favorite ideas for celebrating Advent. You can find them here at Today’s Christian Woman.

The tenth? It’s an idea we tried for the first time last year with our kids. We helped the kids make simple Advent candles which we lit at dinner each night. It was a great way to drive home the idea that Jesus is the light we await in Advent.

We made them simply, using cardboard juice concentrate canisters for molds and crayon pieces to add layers of color. If you’re new to candlemaking, find very easy instructions here.

Treading the Dark Path

It’s cold and dark these mornings.

Darkness, coldness — something our souls do well to remember.

What is it like to live without light, without warmth, without the illumination our spirits long for?

This is the posture we assume during Advent. We step into the shivering darkness of longing and the heavy quietness of waiting.

We plod into the groove tread by Christians centuries over: How long, O Lord? O come, Emmanuel!

Like weary travelers stiff on an age-old night, our eyes strain toward that glimmer, that pinprick of light. That candle in a window that means warmth and home, welcome and hearth.

Oh So Much . . .

Merriam-Webster tells me gratitude‘s antonyms are ingratitude, thanklessness, unappreciation, ungratefulness.

But in soul-terms, much more could be added to this list. On the polar opposite end of the scale from gratitude we find habits and mindsets like worry, bitterness, spiritual malaise, self-reliance, pride, mistrust, over-busyness, selfishness, consumerism, and self-centeredness.

When our hearts are full of a pervasive and interwoven sense of thanks — a conscious awareness that God has given us oh so much – we’re able to live soul-centered in the peace and joy of the abundant life.

When we don’t? We start to buy into the lie that we don’t have enough, that we just need what’s more or what’s next. We live a life grasping out in all the wrong places for an elusive “satisfaction” that cannot be found in material things.

When we train our sight on the many goodnesses God has poured into our lives — loved ones, friendships, sunrises, smiles, bonds of love, church family, and a multitude of rich spiritual blessings — we’re buoyed when hardship or suffering comes. We can trust God because we know how God has come through for us in the past. We can rely on God even if things turn out badly, for we know from experience that God is good.

When we aren’t strengthening our souls in gratitude? We instinctively respond to trouble with worry and anxiety. Rather than relying on God, we turn inward in self-aggrandizing reliance on our own abilities and efforts to work miracles. And if things don’t get better? We become people poisoned by bitterness and anger.

The Jeskes: Extraordinarily Grateful . . . In the Ordinary

It’s Thanksgiving week and I’m so excited to introduce you to Adam and Christine Jeske, co-authors of the new IVP book This Ordinary Adventure: Settling Down Without Settling. Listen in as Adam and Christine share some candid thoughts about living gratefully in the midst of normal, regular, everyday life.

Welcome, Adam and Christine! Tell my readers about yourself.  

Adam: We floss daily. We can levitate. Our two kids never fight, and have never yelled at them. We sit up straight and never slouch. We give away over 100% of our income, which is possible, because we’re not very good at math. Our home is a bastion of aesthetic bliss, from the pioneer vibe, to an epic treehouse, to the raging keggers. We are sarcastic.

(OK, sidenote readers! I’ll fill you in on the Jeskes: After years doing aid work on the international scene, the Jeskes now live in Wisconsin where Christine teaches at Eastern University and Adam serves as associate director of communications for my favorite campus ministry, InterVarsity Christian Fellowship.)

This month we’re focusing on gratitude on my site. So quick, right off the top of your head, what are 5 thing you’re grateful for?

Christine: Just last night before bed with our kids we listed singing songs together, the board game our son made up, warm fall weather, eating dinner in our tree house, and having enough money to buy what we need.

Adam: Doing pilates yesterday (I’m secure in my masculinity, and increasing my core strength helps), drinking Tetley British Blend tea with milk as I type this, having a couple Nerf guns at work, occasionally having a chance to rattle people’s cages, and your request to interview us!

It can be very easy, I think, to live “normal life” in grumbling and a state of discontent — to be envious of the adventures, the experiences, the seemingly better lives of others. From your own experiences, what’s the spiritual danger of this type of mindset? How can we combat it’s creeping power in our lives?

Christine: Yes, we have definitely felt that slide into grumbling over “normal life,” especially in the last couple years back in the U.S. after years overseas. So many people live idolizing adventure, and when they don’t get that adventure, they end up believing, “My life is nothing but a bare little cage I pace around in all day.” But on the other hand, you can also end up idolizing comfort, and get too settled, too far toward the “I love the feeling of my butt sinking into this safe, comfy couch” side of life.

There’s a sweet spot we need to find every day between idolizing adventure and idolizing comfort. In our experience, part of hitting that sweet spot comes from actively noticing what God is doing in your present reality. Phrases like “I will tell of God’s wonderful acts” are used at least sixteen times in the Psalms alone. We need to stop and tell ourselves, and tell other people, about the gorgeous snowfalls, conversations with lonely people, astounding ideas, and all the other daily miracles that remind us we are never just living in a dull prison cell. And when we savor notice and savor these, it also creates a craving in us to see more of God’s work in our world, so much so that we get off our couch and find and create more of it.

Gratitude is a thread woven throughout your new book, This Ordinary Adventure, in the sense that God has been teaching you to receive and gratefully appreciate a way of life that’s — by outward appearances — unadventurous. What practices and habits in your life drive this sense of gratitude?

Christine: One simple practical step that’s helped us appreciate both normal and extraordinary ways God works is to keep a list we call “Amazing Days.” For over 13 years now we’ve kept this list. We write on it whatever makes a day bold, unusual, bright, faithful, or miraculous. As we look back on the list and share it with others, we celebrate the ways God shapes big things through many small days of little things, and also wows us with a few big things now and then. It’s a way to stop “should-ing” ourselves about what doesn’t fit into an already busy and frazzled existence, and instead celebrate what we can experience with and from God Almighty, here and now.

Anchors and Alphabets

“In our confrontations with obstacles or opponents today, we would do well not to focus on the troubles lined up against us,” writes Jim Cymbala in You Were Made For More. “Instead, we need to celebrate the God who has already demonstrated his power and provision in our past. We don’t need to be fretful or anxious. We need to anchor our hearts and minds in God’s overwhelming track record.”

Expressing gratitude — the intentional expression of thanks — is that anchor. Ruth Graham expresses a similar sentiment in Fear Not Tomorrow, God Is Already There: “[O]ne thing that makes it easier for me to trust God is cultivating a habit of remembering what He has already done. I tap into that track record. Remembering is a God-given prescription.”

Have you filled that prescription? Do you actively and regularly choose to remember in gratitude what God has done and is doing in your life?

Years back, on the spur of the moment one bedtime, I came up with a thanksgiving prayer experience to share with my young children. Ironically, though it’s meant for kids, this alphabet prayer habit has woven it’s way into my own spiritual life in order to anchor my soul — as a means of taking that God-given prescription of grateful remembrance.

I describe this practice in my book for parents Faith-Filled Moments. Here’s an excerpt for you to check out . . . and try with your kids (or without!).

Songs My Soul Desperately Needs to Sing

The wind is whipping, the cold rain is drizzling, the russet leaves are falling, the sweaters are worn. It is November, the season of gratitude . . . and I’m thankful for the reminder.

With all the talk of Thanksgiving and new cultural traditions like fb-posting or tweeting a statement of gratitude each day, November has become a time when we all pause to say thank you. And so it may seem obvious, but this month on my blog we’ll focus on what it means to live a grateful life.

Yet gratitude isn’t as easy as it sounds. It doesn’t come naturally to us, especially when life is humming along smoothly. Often for me it’s when something knocks me off course — a visit to the hospital, a word of bad news, a worrisome current event — when suddenly I pause to say thank you. And when I realize how woefully I’ve done at this discipline — this giving and giving and giving again of thanks.

We need to say thanks. Our souls need it desperately and it’s not until we’ve paused to wade into gratitude and splash around a bit that we realize how lacking and pitiful our thanks-giving-habits have been.