The  other day I listened to a powerful radio-show podcast on gratitude featuring R.T. Kendall. Kendall encourages listeners to intentionally pause and reflect with gratitude through the practice of journalling. ”What I do now every day,” Kendall explained, “is read my journal from yesterday, go through every item, and thank the Lord for every little thing. Do you know how long it takes? About 20 seconds.”

What an easy, meaningful practice! Kendall is a journaller like me in the sense that he likes to record and describe all sorts of thoughts and events in a given day. But God made us all different — and for some, the idea of all that writing is just not a good fit.

Another very, very simple way of keeping a gratitude journal is simply committing to write just one (or maybe just three) items each day that you’re thankful for.

Even if you are unable to keep a journal long-term, perhaps you can commit  just for this week to create a short list of “thank yous” to God. If you’re willing to commit just 15-minutes to prayerful gratitude-journalling, I can guarantee your list will NOT be short!

Ah . . . so, so much to receive, to treasure, to be grateful for.

Are you ready, Caryn? Give me your first reaction to this question: What are ten things you’re thankful for? (No cheating: share the first 10 that come to mind.)

Opportunities to write. My kids. My friends. My home. Food. My family’s health. My computer. Facebook. My husband. My dog. (Let’s hope my husband doesn’t see this list! Poor guy eeked in just above the dog. At least he knows how much I love that dog.)

Grumble Hallelujah begins with a description of a low, stressed-out moment for you when you muttered to your husband “I hate my life!” And you also write about the importance of actually grieving the loss of dreams or of ways we might have once hoped our life would turn out. So not to start out too negative here, but why must we come to terms with what we may “hate” about our lives? Why is grieving an important starting place?

 I think grieving the losses is important because it means we’ve actually taken the time to acknowledge the losses and that we’ve determined that the loss was significant enough to grieve. Often times when we’re in the dumps because of junky finances or unfulfilling relationships or just not being where we thought we’d be, we tend to scold ourselves. “How dare I complain about money when so many are so worse off….” “Well, at least I have other friends…..” That sort of thing.

But—as a therapist told me years ago—pain is pain. And it does no good to deny it. So, that’s why I think we need to grieve our hurts and losses and disappointments. Instead of letting the hurt fester down deep and ultimately become bitter, grief allows us to “process” it—to use a therapy-y term—and move forward.

Plus, the Bible tells us to grieve. James tells us that we should let our grief “humble” us before God so he can swoop in and lift us up.  I take this to mean that if we don’t grieve our losses, if we don’t turn our joy to gloom as James says, we’re really just trying to plug away on our own power and not depend on God. Grief is an opportunity to turn it all over to God and trust him.

In your book, you discuss the importance of letting go of our own expectations of how God works (or how we think he ought to work in our lives). Why is this so essential? How can this “letting go” enable us to live in gratitude?

Well, when we’re looking around at how God is working in everyone’s lives or we’re stuck on certain methods that we think God should be employing in our lives, we miss out on the actual work he is doing in our lives.

We miss so much when we don’t let God be God and when we don’t learn to notice him. And when we don’t notice him—and his blessings—it’s hard to be grateful.

The reality is that we’re all prone to be grumbly — there’s a bit of Eeyore in all of us! What encouragement or advice can you offer to my readers about ways we can battle our human tendency toward grumbling, whining, and general discontent?

It’s funny because I don’t really think I’m a natural grumbler or whiner. I mean, I have my moments, but my tendency is to hunker down and press on, never letting others see I’m defeated. Or, at least, that was my natural tendency.

But to those who feel grumbly or discontent all the time, I’d say, that’s no place to be. Grumbling unchecked can become bitterness in a hurry. Especially if it’s grumbling without the hallelujah.

I believe we DO need to allow ourselves time to grumble, to complain, to shake our fists at God. But if we don’t end those sessions with some kind of hallelujah or some sort of ultimate acknowledgement of our trust in or love for him, we’re on the road to a miserable life.

Good grumbling should lead to greater joy and thankfulness.

In the book, I also offer my three “things” that help me know when or what I should be grieving or grumbling about—the things that keep me from whining to God about every last thing in life. They are: 1. What breaks my heart; 2. What I cannot change; and 3. What I have lost.

Others may have their own. But these—which can be applied broadly or locally—help me.

I love the subtitle of your book: Learning to love your life even when it lets you down. That learning curve can be pretty sharp — the process of choosing to love and be grateful and content in our lives requires of a lot of us! What’s this learning-to-love-your-life process been like for you personally? How have you ben changed by it?

Um. The process has been painful. Dreadful. But wonderful. It’s been a time (a long time!) of learning to let go, to lean not on my own understanding of life, if you will. But it’s been in the noticing of how God has used some of these hurts and frustrations and disappointments (many of which I still feel, by the way!) that has brought me a new-found love of life.

I realize how God has shaped me and grown me and set my life on a better trajectory through these trials. And wow. I just wouldn’t want to go back to the way I was—or my life was—before.

I love my life now because I believe I’m so much more in tune with God, with where he wants me, and with where he wants me to go. Sometimes I wish we could learn these sorts of lessons and develop this sort of understanding in easier ways—and maybe some people can. But I apparently can’t. And I’m grateful that God loves me enough to turn rough spots into bright ones.

Caryn, thanks again for swinging by! Readers, you can find Caryn on Facebook and at www.carynrivadeneira.com.

As a kid, saying thank you is of the utmost importance. You know you’re supposed to do it almost constantly. And if you don’t, Mommy’s voice is there with the warning prompt, “Say thank you.” It’s something we’re taught because it’s significant. It’s more than mere politeness — a habit of saying thanks shapes our attitude and posture toward the world.

Ah, but then we grow up. Mommy’s not there any more with her “Say thank you” and we’re left to be as grateful as we wanna be. Do we desire to be grateful? Sure! But often we’re like those nine who — and my childhood shock still rises as I write this — were healed from a terrible disease and a lifetime of being ostracized, and did not turn to say “thank you”! Somehow, even in this dramatic event-of-all-events in their lives, gratitude fell to the wayside.

Only one — a double outsider who was not only a leper but also a Samaritan — came to Jesus and praised him in overflowing gratitude and faith.

What’s strikes me today is the importance of recognizing that this account is not a parable. It sort of reads like one — like a lesson cloaked in hyperbole. After all, there’s no way only one would say thanks! . . . Right?

But it’s no parable. It’s something that literally happened, making its lesson all the more powerful.

The “90%” in this account probably felt grateful later. They likely had moments of wonder that evening as the shock wore off and they realized they’d been healed. But for some reason a “thank you” wasn’t their instinctive reaction. We can speculate why, but perhaps the more weighty matter at hand is considering the question for ourselves.

Why am I  often so neglectful of the practice of expressing gratitude to God? I’ll be pondering and praying about this question today. Will you join me?

But this year God’s nudging me in another direction. Rather than looking ahead, he’s inviting me to look back. To begin 2012 with gratitude.

Will you join me?

“It is a good thing to give thanks to the LORD” (Psalm 92:1, ESV). It is a good so often neglected.

“Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly . . . singing to God with gratitude in your hearts” (Colossians 3:16, NIV). It is a spiritual song that can well up within us . . . if we choose to nurture it.

So I pause to say I am grateful. Grateful for life. For breath. For health. For family. For friends. For shelter. For resources. For opportunities. For love. For God.

This January, join me in pondering, practicing, and learning from God about gratitude.

Christmas wasn’t just yesterday. In the church calendar, Christmas literally is to be celebrated for 12 days! So even today in your post-Christmas-Day-recovery-mode, your heart can continue to sing at the manger and wonder at the glory of the Incarnation.

One simple celebration idea I want to share is to infuse this week with music. Christmas carols and hymns proclaim some of the most stunning theological truths! One of my favorite web sites, the cyberhymnal, has the lyrics (and music to listen to) for 507 Christmas hymns. Yes, 507!!!

So, if you want to sing them all, that’s 42.25 songs per day for the 12 days of Christmas. (If you missed yesterday, you’ll need to catch up!)

But in all seriousness, I do believe one of the most profound ways I’ve encountered God in my personal times of prayer and worship has been in pondering old hymns that are new to me. Find time this week to visit Cyberhymnal (or your own hymnal on your bookshelf) and prayerfully ponder the lyrics of a Christmas hymn that is new to you.

When all is cleaned up, when our culture has moved on from Christmas after just 24-hours, you can remain at the manger.

Live in the wonder.

Its corollary, feasting, often seems unspiritual to us. Is it good to have fun and celebrate with friends? Sure. But is it part of spiritual growth? Hmmm . . .

This week of all weeks I do declare that feasting — laughing with friends, enjoying food, drinking deeply of life — can be a very meaningful spiritual practice. In fact it ought to be part of our spiritual rhythm — joy, gratitude, exuberant delight in the good gifts of life ought to be one of the most significant characteristics of a Christian’s outlook on life!

God’s people in the Old Testament structured their life, year after year, around fasts and significant feasts:

• Passover, a solemn celebration in remembrance of God’s protection of his people from death during the last plague in Egypt (Leviticus 23:5–8; Deuteronomy 16:1–8);

• the Feast of Weeks (Shavuot), a festive celebration of gratitude during the wheat harvest involving dancing, music, and offerings to God (Leviticus 23:15-22; Deuteronomy 16:9-12);

• the Festival of Booths (Sukkot), a celebration both somber and joyous, recalling the wandering in the dessert and full of its own traditions including building booths/tents to sleep outdoors (Leviticus 23:33-43; Deuteronomy 16:13-15).

• Another important Jewish celebration that came into view in the intertestamental period and was part of Jesus’ own celebration was the Feast of Dedication (Hanukkah, also called the Festival of Lights)  in which God’s people remembered a miracle and the rededication of the temple in the 2nd century BC (see John 10:22).

A rhythm of feasting around which one’s life was structured — God designed it to form the soul in gratitude. To help his people remember, over and over and over, all that he had done, all that he was and is, all that he had promised.

For us today, celebration can be profoundly spiritual if our hearts are likewise focused on gratitude and remembrance — if our spirits are sitting at the table of joy with God as our host.

Feasting can be complicated — we must consider and be wary of the lure of self-centeredness and materialism during feasts, keeping in mind the needy and the mindset God urges us to have toward money and stuff (stewardship). Yet the example in Scripture of multiple celebrations, year after year, tells us clearly that it’s okay to feast. In fact, it’s important.  It’s a good thing to have moments marked by bounty, by enjoyment of the blessed gifts of food and drink and family.

This week, whatever your Advent/Christmas traditions are — be they as simple as store-bought candy canes and watching Elf on TV or as elaborate as a fully decorated house, a bountiful meal, and a festive tree — prioritize the spiritual feast. In your heart, receive God’s invitation to enjoy life’s good gifts with him. As you do, you’re able to view your own feasting through the spiritual lens of gratitude: thank you for this food, for this family, for this laughter, and even for this post-feast mess.

God is so good.

Merry Christmas.

Freebie Fridays are fun . . . I’ll have to do them again sometime in 2012. Sound good?

You may have heard of Holley Gerth–she’s got a hugely popular blog called “Heart to Heart with Holley.” She’s the author of Rain on Me, God’s Heart for You, and You’re Already Amazing. She’s also created thousands of greeting cards and gifts for DaySpring, the Christian subsidiary of Hallmark and is the cofounder of their web site for women, (in)courage. Holley shares her heart and home with Mark and a crazy dog.

I’m sure you’ll be encouraged and inspired by her honest words.  Keep reading . . . 

Holley, tell my readers about yourself!

I love chocolate, coffee, my husband, and Jesus (not in that order). I’m not a morning person—I once put chocolate on the alarm clock to bribe myself to get up. I ate it and went back to bed. Yes, ma’am. But I married an early bird so I’m learning to change my ways. I’m named after my Grandpa Hollie. He and my Grandma had a  Christian bookstore so I grew up dreaming of being a writer. Being able to share God’s heart with women through words is my passion and I feel so grateful to be able to do so every day. It’s the next best thing to having coffee with all of my readers—which I would do if I could!

This month we’re looking at the twin spiritual disciplines of worship and celebration. In a very basic sense, I define them as praising and thanking God for who he is (worship); and praising and thanking God for what he does (celebration). Why do you think these disciplines are important?

Our church service last night was actually about worship and how it transforms us. The pastor talked about how closely the word “worship” is related to “service” in Greek and Hebrew. Over time I’ve come to see worship not as what we do at church but as a lifestyle of serving Jesus. To me, worship means bowing our hearts to God and saying, “I’m your servant. Use me as little or as much as you want.” That’s actually the prayer I say each morning as I get ready to write. I’ve also started writing what I’m thankful for in a journal each day. I use an unlined journal and draw all kinds of crazy pictures and things. But it works for me. 

I recently read that our brains have a natural “negativity bias.” In other words, we tend to focus on and remember what’s negative better. That is a gift from God to help us survive (for example, focusing more on the bear charging out of the woods than the lovely flower behind it). But on a day-to-day basis, it means that we have to be intentional about refocusing our hearts and attention. We don’t need to feel guilty about our tendency to be negative but we do need to recognize it and change it through worship and gratitude. What’s amazing is that our brains literally rewire themselves as we think new thoughts. We actually create new neural pathways and are “transformed by the renewing of our minds.” Isn’t that beautiful?

Wow — Yes! Celebration can take many forms — gratitude, joy, prayer, praise, feasting, and more. When has celebration made a difference in your life?

I feel like this has been a year of learning to embrace joy in my life. I love the verse in Psalm that says, “The Lord delights in the well-being of His servant.” God wants us to thrive. He wants us to be full of joy. He wants to give us His best. Yes, we experience hard seasons but that doesn’t mean we’re intended to live that way forever. Embracing celebration and joy has shown me a different side of God and His love for me. The more I see of who He is and how good He wants to be to us, the more my heart wants to respond by bringing Him joy in return. And that’s what life is really all about in the end. It’s even better motivation to get out of bed than chocolate on your alarm clock.

December strikes me as such a natural season for worship and celebration as we focus on Advent and Christmas. What do you love most about this season? What makes it spiritually meaningful to you? 

Confession: The holidays are hard for me. I lost a loved one close to Christmas and that, along with some other reasons, mean that I usually struggle through the last couple of months a year. After having a very bad attitude about this {picture lots of whining and complaining here} I decided it was time to have a little talk with Jesus about how I could approach Christmas differently this time around. For example, this year instead of gifts I’m asking for people to meet a need in someone else’s life and then give me a card on Christmas telling me what they did. I know some people really feel loved and show love through actual presents but for me stories and words warm my heart so that’s what I wanted this year. 

I also realized that I’m an introvert and if I don’t plan for times to refuel in this super-social season then I wind up exhausted—even though being with friends and family are what I love most about this time of year. So I’ve tried to plan a less hectic schedule than usual. We celebrate the holidays like we’re all the same but our personalities and needs are very different so I think it’s important to figure out what works best for us so we can really love others well and truly celebrate Jesus. 

As you’ve just alluded to, there are times in life when celebration is the farthest thing from our minds — when life is very difficult or painful. What encouragement would you offer someone who’s in a difficult season? How can she “celebrate”? What might that mean for her?

Like I mentioned above, the holidays are often difficult for me so I can definitely relate. I would say first not to feel guilty or be hard on yourself. God understands your grief and what you’re facing. You don’t have to put on a happy face for this season. Find safe people who will share your hurt and talk through what you’re experiencing with them. Take good care of yourself — physically, emotionally, socially and spiritually. This is a time for extra TLC. 

It can feel like the whole world is having a good ‘ole time but research shows that the holidays are tough for a lot of people. So remember you’re loved, you’re not alone, and you will make it through this time. Make new traditions for you and your family if needed. Most of what we do at the holidays is more cultural than anything we’re actually told to do biblically so feel free to change up what “normal” means as much as you want. 

 And if you need those around you to understand what you’re going through, consider writing a letter explaining so you don’t have to repeat your story or needs over and over. People truly do want to help but often they don’t know how and can even make our hurt deeper without intending to do so. Let others know what they can give your heart this Christmas season. 

Thank you, Holley! Readers, you can connect with Holley at www.HolleyGerth.com.

Next Friday I’ll draw a name from the blog subscriber’s list to win a brand new copy of the NLT LIVE Bible — a project I was the development editor for. It’s a sweet Bible with really cool art and original poetry throughout along with powerful devos. If you want in on this opportunity, be sure to subscribe!

And on Monday, an exciting special guest will be joining us — Holley Gerth, an author and mega-blogger. She’ll share her thoughts about celebration, the holidays, and what it means to celebrate even in the midst of heartache. Stay tuned!

Worship and celebration are often intertwined in Scripture and in our own practice. To put it very simply, I see worship as actions, expressions, or an inner focus on praising God for who God is. I see celebration as actions, expressions, or an inner focus on praising God for what God does.

Worship can involve singing, service, prayer, and much much more. Celebration is driven by gratitude and can can involve feasts, traditions, expressions of thanksgiving, and much more.

Will you join me today by using this blog as a venue for worshipping God or celebrating what he does or has done in your life? Please leave a comment here to get the dialogue going. Thanks!

(**Don’t forget: This week is the first Freebie Friday. One subscriber wins a free book. Spread the word!)